OVC Help Series for Victims of Crime: What is Child Abuse?

The next series on child abuse focuses on types of child abuse and how it can affect the child.

How Can I Tell If I'm Being Abused?

It may sound strange, but people who have lived with abuse for many years may not even realize that they are being abused. If you have grown up in a family where abuse occurs almost every day, you may think that hitting, pushing, or constant yelling are normal ways to treat the members of your family and other people. Every family has arguments, but when yelling goes too far or lasts too long or when disagreements turn physical, that is abuse, and abuse is not normal or healthy.

It may help to understand and recognize that kids may experience one or more of these four kinds of abuse.

  • Physical abuse is hitting, shaking, burning, pinching, biting, choking, throwing, beating, or other actions that cause physical injury or pain, or leave marks.

  • Sexual abuse is any kind of sexual contact with a child or youth. It includes direct physical contact, such as when an abuser touches a young person’s private parts with his/her hands, body parts, or objects, or when an abuser has a child touch these parts on the abuser’s body. Sexual abuse may also involve showing a child or young person pictures or movies of other people without their clothes on, or it may involve taking these types of pictures of the child or young person. Sometimes abusers show or threaten to show these pictures or videos to other people to scare kids into not telling about the abuse.

  • Emotional abuse involves yelling, name-calling, swearing, or constantly criticizing or humiliating a young person. It also can include denying basic emotional needs such as withholding affection or security from a young person. Emotional abuse often occurs along with physical and sexual abuse.

  • Neglect occurs when a parent does not provide for a young person’s basic needs and safety—necessities such as food, proper clothing, a place to live, or medical care. Leaving kids alone for long periods or kicking them out of the house can also be neglect.

If you have been hurt—physically, sexually, emotionally, or due to neglect—you may be a victim of abuse. Abuse and neglect can affect the way you view yourself and the rest of the world. You might—

  • Feel afraid, anxious, angry, confused, or sad.

  • Fear being hurt again.

  • Have trouble sleeping, eating, and concentrating.

  • Skip school or not do well in school.

  • Have lots of headaches or stomachaches.

  • Use drugs or alcohol.

  • Feel ashamed or even blame yourself for becoming a victim.

  • Have trouble with relationships with friends or other people.

  • Not know where to turn for help.